once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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