okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
