Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
