Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
