dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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