Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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