did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
