Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I accidentally burped into my bong.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
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