Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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