So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
