Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
