Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
