We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
