Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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