Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
you inspire me to be a worse person
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
