Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize