oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
How does one acquire holy water?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
