i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So vagazzling was a success
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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