Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I need a beard to bite.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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