So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
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