when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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