I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
