I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
The power of my boobs compel you
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
