I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
