well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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