Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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