I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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