He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
