yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
