Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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