I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
