they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
