the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Mom said you looked used
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
