You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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