Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
