you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
