I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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