he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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