so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
