Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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