Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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