he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
