Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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