i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
