My nipple is on Facebook.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
