the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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