How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
