TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Randomize
