rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
