I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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