girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
