I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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